Sunday, February 26, 2012

Still here

If someone would have asked me a year ago if I would stay out in Abilene on my own free will without the military tying us to this place I would have said HELL NO! I am not so emphatic on that hell no now. I mean yes it is hard to be away from my older babies but they are doing fantastic. All three of them are doing very well in school and making lots of friends. I see them pretty often so I am adjusting to the change more. My answer has changed more because I have opened myself up more to acclimating to this life.  I am really liking my new job. There are a lot more challenges with it than I am accustomed to when it comes to that type of setting.  I have made a big group of friends. I have some great aquantiences and some really great super close friends who I enjoy being able to spend time with. Some of those great friends have already moved away but we are still in contact and I look at it now as a new place to go and visit.


A lot of people have suggested we get out of here. That this town is of full of military memories that it will just make life harder for us. Honestly he has 14 years of memories moving is not going to erase them. I also opted just to not pick up and move with no real game plan in mind. Yes our goal is to get back to Dallas but that is very hard when you don't have a job lined up, a place to live and the financial means at the moment to do so. Granted in the fall we probably could have don this but I was in school and Chris knows how hard I am working to finish my degree. Plus we have a lease that we need to be responsible with. A lot of times people don't look at the big picture and just look at the immediate gratification from a situation.  It is hard to make those around me often understand exactly what all would go int our moving.  To answer the burning question yes we will be home to Dallas when though is still up in the air. I am so close to finishing my degree, Chris is going to school, we love our work with the Potosi VFD, and he and I both have a job we enjoy for now. 


There have been a lot of life altering discussions taking place at the moment. Only a few have been previe to at this time. I am making it clear that I am whole heartedly supporting this and will help Chris see this opportunity through. This is my job as his wife and friend to be his biggest supporter even when the odds are stacked against us. I am his realist when we know that when it comes down to it that the big calls have to be made. Even if I have an inkling of a doubt in my mind I will still support him so that way he can in the end turn around and say that I tried and did my very best. I never want him to look back with regrets on anything he has done in his life. 


These next few months are filled with big, busy plans. I am excited to see the kids for a week for their Spring Break. I am trying to put some fun activities together for them but also get them out to meet more kids around here so when the summer comes they have peers their own age to hang out with.  We have weddings to attend, fun friendly get togethers with some great people out here. 


I will say it I am shocked I lasted out here this long. The first few months last year where the hardest by far. I spent this morning looking back at what I was doing this time last year and the year before. This time last year I was spending most of my time in the house with H doing a lot of nothing. I had not started work yet and only had 2 friends. I was struggling to stay positive and questioned often if my choice of moving was the best idea. This time two years ago Chris and I where married. I can't believe two years went so fast.  I put up a picture of our wedding photo and decided to scroll through the album. Seeing so happy and in love really brought back some wonderful memories of that day. It made me think about how happy and in love we really where and how much we had put into this relationship to make it get that far. 


So yes we are still here and really just not going anywhere for now. We have our feet firmly planted in Abilene unless these new life plans tell us differently. We have our sights set on what we want and we hope to see those come to be in the next year. By this time next year I am hoping that what Chris has set out to do is accomplished and underway, I hope to see myself graduating with my associates degree, I hope to see us making our way back to where we started from and building a life with our entire family.  For now we are just going to focus on this path we are on and know what we are doing should have big pay offs in the end.